Navigating Challenging Emotions Around Parent-Centered Holidays
For many, holidays like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are a time of joy, gathering, and celebration. For others, the
anticipation of these holidays—and the days themselves—can feel overwhelming and anxiety-inducing. These holidays can
intensify reminders of what we’ve lost, relationships we don’t have, or the connections we longed for but never experienced.
Going out to a restaurant, scrolling through social media filled with family photos, or browsing gift guides can stir up a deep
sense of grief. Please know you are not alone. From our perspective as therapists, we know many people who struggle for
various reasons through Mother’s and Father’s Day, so we have compiled a few ideas on how to navigate and cope with
these complex emotions.
“My child, adolescent, or teenager has parents going through separation or divorce—how do I help them celebrate the other co-
parent?”
Ideally, it’s helpful if each co-parent can support their child in choosing a card or small gift for the other parent being
celebrated. This takes pressure off the child and goes a long way in nurturing both parent-child relationships.
We realize that is not always possible. In those cases, you might encourage your child to make a homemade card, create
something at school, or spend quality time together—such as watching a favorite movie or show. These simple gestures
can be a meaningful way to acknowledge the holiday.
“I’ve lost a parent or child and dread holidays like Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.”
First and foremost, please know whatever you’re feeling is valid. Grief can show up in many different ways, and it’s okay
to feel sadness, anger, numbness, or even confusion.
We encourage you to be gentle with yourself. That might mean taking a walk, spending time with someone you trust, or
giving yourself full permission to stay in and binge your favorite show.
You might also find comfort in creating a ritual to honor your loved one: cook their favorite meal, listen to a song that
reminds you of them, or light a candle in their memory.
“I have an estranged relationship with a parent, and it’s painful to see all the ‘normal’ parent relationships on this day when
that’s just not my reality.”
This pain is real, and you are not alone in feeling it. If there’s someone in your life who has offered nurturing or
support—a stepparent, grandparent, aunt, or even a close friend—you might consider acknowledging them on this day. A
simple text, card, or small gift can be meaningful for both of you.
It may also help to take control of what you’re exposed to. Many companies now allow you to opt out of Mother’s Day or
Father’s Day marketing emails—consider taking advantage of that option or unsubscribing altogether. Staying off social
media for the day can also be a protective and healing choice.
We recognize these suggestions may not address every unique situation, so we encourage you to explore your personal
experience with your therapist during your sessions. Additionally, we understand not everyone finds these holidays difficult.
If you have positive or meaningful experiences during this time, we welcome discussions around those as well.
For more resources on coping with grief during Mother’s Day, be sure to check out what’s on our bookshelf.
